NBA Conspiracy Theory

nba-logoOK, I’m a conspiracy theorist. Like Juvenile…I get it from my mama! I’m of the belief that things that can’t be explained logically…are fixed. And when it comes to NBA conspiracies…I believe in ’em just like Rasheed Wallace. I’m crazy right? OK…

Does anybody think that it was merely a coincidence that in the same year the self-proclaimed “King of Akron” LeBron James declared for the NBA Draft, the Cleveland Cavaliers got the #1 pick? How about the Chicago Bulls picking first this year where Derrick Rose (being from Chicago) has decided to come out despite the team basically having a slim-to-none chance of even getting the top pick? Eerily similar to 1985 when Patrick Ewing, the biggest prize in college basketball went to the New York Knicks, the leagues biggest market in the first ever draft lottery. Is there no such thing as traveling anymore? What is a foul these days? How come everyone in the NBA is actually an inch or two shorter than listed in real life? Tim Donaghy? The NBA is so focused on being global and that’s why the San Antonio Spurs have won the NBA Championship 4 times because isn’t their team essentially the United Nations? Which also explains the Cavs vs Spurs in last years Finals because LeBron James’ Nike affiliation has made him China’s most popular non-asian athlete (who coincidentally will host this years Olympics). And the biggest of them all, Lakers vs Celtics in this years NBA Finals! How convenient that the rivalry that pretty much shaped the league is being played out again 20 years after their last title meeting. Ratings and revenue my friends…ratings and revenue. I’m crazy right? OK…

Paul Pierce “injuring” his knee in game one? Carried off the court, taken back to the locker room in a wheel chair and then coming back a la Willis Reed? Fake. The Los Angeles Lakers only shooting 10 free throws in game 2? Fixed. We can even go back to game 4 of the Spurs/Lakers series. That no call on Derek Fisher at the end? Hmmm… There really is somebody in the grassy knoll, and his name is David Stern. The Lakers/Celtics series is going to go 7 games with the final game being played in Boston and the Celtics will probably end up hanging banner 17. No way is the league going to let Los Angeles beat Boston when the Lakers just won a title 6 years ago and the Celtics haven’t won in 22 years! I ordinarily wouldn’t bet against the best player on the planet a/k/a Kobe Bryant, but even he isn’t more powerful than Comissioner Stern a/k/a The NBA.


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